*Disclaimer* I do not have any of these achievements though I've attempted most of them. By the beard of Odin, I'm only a man.
HERE WE GO!
10. Dead Rising - 7 Day Survivor
7 days...just one week. You only need to survive for one week in a zombie and psycho infested mall. Also, your health is continually depleting...oh, and you can't save your game. It's a one shot deal. You die, power goes out, Xbox locks up, kangaroo kicks the power cord out of the wall, Mom bursts in your room and shuts off the box because you didn't finish your homework and you're always playing those damn games...anything that causes the game to go off and you have to start over. It's 2 hours per day so e , are talking about 14 hours straight. You can pause the game to take a break, but then you run the risk of something horrible happening.
The actual surviving might not be too hard...except there is a limited amount of precious health bar filling food in the mall. So not only so you need to contend with everything else, take too much damage while trying to survive and you can easily run out of time.
I made a few runs at this back when Dead Rising had first come out. I never made it past day 4.
9. Call of Duty 4 - Mile High Club
Despite being named after the mythical club of folks who have allegedly boned on an airplane, the Mile High Club achievement in Call of Duty 4 is an exercise in frustration and rage.
Mile High Club is a bonus mission on Call of Duty 4 that is unrelated to the rest of the game. You have to beat it on "veteran" difficulty, which is the hardest in the game, and you have one minute...that's right, one minute to accomplish this feat. Within this minute, you have to fight through about 30 guards on a commercial airliner to secure a hostage. You will die...lots. over and over again you will die. Then, when you slow it down a bit to survive, you will run out of time. Over and over again you will run out of time. Finding the balance between time and survival is key and it is damn hard to do. I worked on this achievement for about 3 hours before abandoning it forever. It's just one minute long so it isn't higher on the list. More skilled players might say this isn't that hard...they are liars.
8. Ninja Gaiden 2 - Way of the Master Ninja
Ninja Gaiden 2 is a jerk. There is no other way to describe it. The people who made are obviously misanthropes and wanted to figure out how they could best stick it to humanity. "Let's make a gorgeous game that is tons of fun...but let's make it as hard as possible." Bunch of jerks. Anyway, this achievement is for the simple task of beating the game on its hardest difficulty setting. That's all, just cut and ninja flip your way through throngs of multi-colored ninjas and werewolves and demons. Wade through rivers of blood as you hack through endless enemies all hell-bent on your demise. It's a really hard game on the easiest difficulty...when you turn up challenge the game becomes damn near impossible.
7. Rock Band 2 - Bladder of Steel
I'm pretty awesome on guitar. I can beat any song on expert and five star most. Learning to play an instrument on Rock Band isn't necessarily difficult on its own. There are the rhythmically challenged who will never be any good, but most people with a lot of practice can learn to beat the game on expert. This achievement is specifically about the time it takes. In order to get the Bladder of Steel achievement you have to not only beat the endless setlist, which is every on disc song in the game, but you can't fail a song, and...you can't pause the game. No pauses at all...using a wireless controller and the battery runs out...TOO BAD! 84 songs, 6 and a half hours, and no breaks. Plus, you have to have the skill to not fail. As good as I am on guitar, I still fail some of the really tough songs sometimes. I couldn't imagine being 6 hours in and failing on Painkiller. I'm pretty sure I would throw the guitar through the TV.
I've never had the opportunity to even try for this achievement. I have kids and a lack of Rock Band playing friends around to help. No way I would try solo. I want someone to be there to bail me out in case I screw up.
6. G.R.A.W. - World Champion
Ahhh....Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter. What a great title. First of all, you aren't just a fighter, you are a WARfighter. Plus, you're an advanced warfighter, not one of those basic warfighters. When this game first came out it was all of the rage. Primarily because it was one of the first really great online titles early in the 360's library of games. I can remember getting great groups of people together to shoot each other over the fat pipes of the internet. Anyway, I've not said much about the achievement yet because there isn't a whole lot to cover here. It's quite simple. In order to get this achievement, you just have to be the #1 ranked player on Xbox live. The #1 ranked player in the world. That's it. If you have any experience with games (and if you are reading my blog, I imagine you do) then you understand just how impossible this achievement is. I will never even come close to this nor will I ever know anyone who will come close to this. It's a ridiculous achievement.
5. Hexic - Grand Pearl Poo-Bah
Hexic is a really fun little game. It comes with every Xbox packed with a hard drive so pretty much everyone has played it. I've been playing it since I bought my Xbox in 2005. That's nearly 6 years of on and off Hexic. It's the perfect title for killing some time and relaxing. The idea is you rotate colored gems to make groups of three. If you can circle a single piece with all of one color, you make a silver star piece. Not that hard. You can easily make a bunch of them every game if you are careful. Now...if you can surround a single piece with silver stars...that's 6 silver stars arranged in a circle, you make a black pearl. I've managed to do this exactly 7 times. Over the course of 6 years I've made 7 black pearls. To get the Grand Pearl Poo-Bah achievement, you need to surround a single piece with 6 black pearls. 6 BLACK PEARLS!! I've only made 7 of them in 6 years and they expect you to make 6 in one game and move them into a circle pattern. Now, maybe I suck at Hexic and other people will tell you how they can do this in their sleep, but I've never met one. The great thing about Hexic though is it is a very fun game to play, so I'll keep trying. Maybe someday I'll make 2 black pearls in one game...I doubt it though.
4. Super Meat Boy - I'm a Golden God
Super Meat Boy is a game designed to be as hard as possible. However, because of how fast the game loads, it doesn't get boring or frustrating. You will die...a lot. I'm talking thousands and thousands of times. Most people will never finish it. They will either give up, or their hands will become so crippled they can't continue. To get the I'm a Golden God achievement, you need to 100% complete the game. That's find every bandage, beat every level, beat every bonus level, beat every hidden level, find everything in the game, and do it all with A+ scores. I can't express the difficulty of this game in words. You have to play it to understand. So, go play, then cry for awhile as you think about what this achievement entails. Then decide it is probably not worth the effort and move on to something else. Just don't bother with the next few achievements on this list either.
3. Star Ocean: The Last Hope - 100% Battle Trophies
Battle trophies are what they sound like. An award given for various combat events. Fight so many enemies, do so much damage, etc...There are exactly 900 to obtain. 100 for each of the 9 characters. None of them are particularly difficult to get on their own, but the sheer volume of them means the time required is absolutely ridiculous. I'm talking hundreds and hundreds of hours playing this relatively mediocre game just to obtain arbitrary awards for every character. It's a boring achievement and I'm forced to question the sanity of anyone who bothered getting it. I have zero intention of ever trying.
2. Final Fantasy XI - Reach lvl. 75 with any class
Ahhh...Final Fantasy XI. I've personally never played it on the Xbox, but I spent a fair amount of time playing it on PC back when it first came out. This is another one of those absolutely time consuming achievements. FFXI is designed to take forever to accomplish ANYTHING. Square wanted to make sure people kept paying to play because they went out and insured that anything you want to do in the game would be slow as hell. If I ever do an article on the 10 hardest games to get all the achievements in, this will be #1. Not only so you need to level one class to 75...you need to level all of them. This would literally take years. It's cumbersome and tiring and I just don't even want to think about it anymore. To anyone that manages to level one class to 75...kudos, I guess.
1. Mega Man 10 - Mr. Perfect
Oh, Capcom. Why do you hate us? Mega Man 10 is a piece of retro pie that is delicious to eat. Those of us who grew up playing the old Mega Man games immediately recognize 10 as a perfect retro title. Exactly as good as the old Mega Man games were. Mega Man games have always had their difficulties, and the new ones are no different. You need to try to figure out which boss weapons work on which bosses, kill all 8 bosses, then fight your way through Dr. Wily's lair, usually battle all the bosses again, then kill Wily. All this achievement wants you to do is beat the entire game...without getting hit. That's right, zero damage. Stray bullet hit you near the end of the game...START OVER. Mistime a jump and fall? START OVER. No damage, no hits, no mistakes from the beginning of the game to the end. It would be one thing if this was an easy game but it's Mega Man. It's quite difficult at times. Sadly, this is another achievement that I know my old, withered fingers will never get. As a matter of fact, check your friends list right now. Anyone that has this achievement is clearly a Cylon because no human can do it. TURN THEM IN TO THE PROPER AUTHORITIES!
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